The Day I Emailed the Whole Company

Let me tell you about the worst Monday of my working life.

我來說說我上班以來最慘的一個星期一。

It was nine fifteen, and I'd just come out of a two-hour meeting.

那時九點十五分，我剛開完一場兩小時的會。

A meeting that, honestly, could have been an email.

說真的，那場會寄一封信就夠了。

So I wrote a quick message to my friend Priya in marketing.

於是我寫了一封短信給行銷部的朋友Priya。

I said the meeting was so boring, I nearly fell asleep in my coffee.

我說那場會無聊到我差點趴在咖啡上睡著。

I said the slides looked like they were made in nineteen ninety-five.

我說那些投影片看起來像1995年做的。

And then, well... I'm not proud of this,

然後，嗯……這件事我可不覺得光彩，

but I described the presenter's voice as a sleepy foghorn.

但我把主講人的聲音形容成一支想睡的霧笛。

I pressed send, feeling very pleased with myself.

我按下傳送，還覺得自己很厲害。

Two minutes later, my inbox started filling up with replies!

兩分鐘後，我的收件匣開始塞滿回信。

Dozens of them. From people I'd never even met!

好幾十封。都是我根本沒見過的人寄來的！

My stomach dropped. I checked the address line.

我心裡一沉，趕快去看收件人那一欄。

It wasn't Priya. It was All Staff. Six hundred people.

不是Priya，是「全體員工」。六百個人。

I wanted the floor to open up and swallow me.

我真想找個地洞鑽進去。

Of course, I tried to recall it. Far too late.

我當然試著收回，可是太遲了。

And worst of all? The presenter was our head of finance!

最慘的是什麼？那位主講人是我們的財務長！

Then, at ten o'clock, an email arrived from the CEO.

接著，十點鐘，執行長寄來一封信。

I honestly thought I was about to be fired.

說真的，我以為自己要被開除了。

But instead, she wrote, "Thank you for your honesty!"

結果她寫的是：「謝謝你的坦白。」

She said our meetings had become far too long,

她說我們的會議變得太長了，

and asked every manager to cut them in half.

還要求每位主管把會議時間砍一半。

That afternoon... the head of finance came to my desk.

那天下午……財務長走到我的座位旁。

I started apologising before he'd even opened his mouth.

他還沒開口，我就開始道歉了。

But he just laughed and said, "A sleepy foghorn? That's fair."

可是他只是笑著說：「想睡的霧笛？說得也對。」

Then he asked me to help him redesign his slides!

接著他請我幫他重做投影片！

Now we run a training course on short, clear meetings.

現在我們一起開了一門教人開短而清楚的會的課程。

People actually look forward to it, believe it or not.

信不信由你，大家居然還很期待。

So yes, it was the most embarrassing day of my career.

所以沒錯，那是我職涯中最丟臉的一天。

But it was also the best mistake I've ever made.

但那也是我犯過最棒的錯誤。

Still, these days, I check the address line three times.

不過，現在我都會把收件人欄位檢查三次。